Sunday, December 21, 2025

Matthew 1: 18-25 - Sunday, December 21, 2025 - Advent IV

 

Pastor Chelsea Harmon, from the Reformed Church congregation in Langley, writes “In other years, [on the 4th Sunday of Advent] we hear the stories about Mary and Elizabeth saying yes to God; this year we hear about how Joseph said yes, learned a new measure of righteousness, and how his obedience supported another’s calling.”  Indeed, while most years this is Mary’s Sunday, in this year’s lectionary Joseph steps out of the shadows.  (Spoiler alert: in part because of this, Mary comes back to centre stage in this year’s Christmas Eve service!!)

Although the holy family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph is held in high esteem, the Bible tells us little about Joseph, and that has left us yearning for more. Countless generations have wanted to know more about him: his life’s story, his relationship with God, and how he received the news of a completely unexpected pregnancy.  And while the whole notion of virgin birth may stretch our 21st century sensibilities, this is one of many places in the Bible where there is so much to learn by entering into the world of this story as it unfolds before us, to be curious rather than dismissive of the interactions between the characters in the story and their gracious, eternal God. However we take it, this story of the birth of Immanuel, God-with-Us, speaks of the intimacy God desires with us, and the role that common folk can play in making that divine intimacy embodied and real.

Given how little the Bible tells us about Joseph, it comes as no surprise that traditions have sprung up over the ages to fil the information gap. One tradition, is that Mary and Joseph had known each other for a long time, both growing up at Nazareth in Galilee.  Imagine the level of shame and betrayal that this Joseph would have experienced, at hearing that his betrothed, Mary, was with child.  They would have been the talk of the town, with all the intersections between families in a small town like Nazareth, and any plans that they or their families had mapped out would have come crashing down just like that.  That Joseph, I imagine, would have been deeply hurt and may have been tempted to use the legal and religious recourse available to him, to punish Mary for what would have felt like a shared future, shattered.

A second tradition, is that Joseph was from Bethlehem.  Not just that his family was from Bethlehem, as per Luke’s account of a census that hailed Jews to their ancestral hometowns, but that Bethlehem was Joseph’s home.  If this is true, picture Joseph not so much as a tradesman with a nicely established business in his hometown of Nazareth, but as a working man from down south, seeking to ply his trade up north in Galilee… following the work, as still happens, particularly if you work in construction or resource extraction. 

While most Bible translations refer to Joseph as a “carpenter,” the Greek word so translated, Tekton, was broader than that: a builder, an architect, a stonemason, a tradesman.  It’s a good thing he didn’t just rely on carpentry, for wood is fairly scarce Galilee, whereas black basalt stone was plentiful, and homes and even furniture tended to be made from that.  As posited by James Fleming, “Joseph would have formed and made nine out of ten projects from stone, either by chiseling or carving the stone or stacking building blocks.”

Further to this notion, in the days of Joseph, up in Galilee, the Romans had some huge construction projects needing lots of workers, both skilled and unskilled.  Is it hard to imagine Joseph heading up there to get work, and finding himself drawn to this small-town girl named Mary?   Not to my mind it isn’t.  And if this version of Joseph were to hear that Mary was expecting, well, what would his response be?  Could be that he knew other couples in the same situation and he’d just roll with it… or since he was basically unknown up there, it could be that it would be much easier to just divorce her, leave town, and head back south to Bethlehem.

A third portrait of Joseph focuses not on where he was from, but when.  This widespread tradition imagines him as much, much, much older than Mary.  In this tradition, we envision an arranged marriage, the local matchmakers finding a solid, thoughtful, respectable man for young Mary.  This Joseph could have been a widower – which smooths out references in the gospels of the siblings of Jesus, for those asserting the perpetual virginity of Mary – and it also explains why only Mary was present at the foot of the cross rather than Mary and Joseph, for Joseph would have died long since. 

And how would this Joseph have taken the news, that his young, betrothed one was with child?  This older Joseph, methinks, may have had the savvy to give it a few days – to listen to what the God-inspired dream was telling him about his young bride – and to step back from revenge.  This older Joseph may be less concerned about what other people would think, though I suspect he would not have been eager to tell his previous family about it.  

As I hear these possible “back-stories” about Joseph, I find myself drawn to doing two things… and then a third thing comes to mind, too.

First, I want to express gratitude to any of these versions of Joseph for holding such compassion for his betrothed, Mary, and for his openness to listen to what God was telling him to do, even at the risk of embarrassment or judgment by his family and neighbours.  The cultural pressures pressing him to divorce Mary would have been strong, and while rarely used, the law did permit that a woman caught in such circumstances could be put to death by stoning,.  And yet, sensing God in the midst of this mess in ways he could not understand, Joseph chose something else.  Whether he was guided by a dream, a holy visitor, or just his conscience, Joseph was inspired by God to choose a different response that would require him to stretch, a lot… and he did.

But after expressing that gratitude for Joseph, I acknowledge with dismay how often stories like this still happen in our world.  Mary then, and hundreds of millions of women now, have little or no agency to actually direct their lives: the thing to happen next in her life is decided by someone else, a man following the rules of patriarchy. Without downplaying the gracious and courageous course of action taken by Joseph, he had the benefit of privilege that Mary did not have and that describes the life of far too many women at this very moment.

In the world of 2025 patriarchy still runs rampant, with some 22 million women in forced marriages where they have no say over their lives, and countless others with limited agency, no voting rights, little access to education, and no pathway to careers.  On top of that, there are nations where the rights of women, which were already behind the rights of men, are being dismantled as patriarchy reasserts itself in the halls of power, in one populist regime after another.  And it’s not just governments; our Abrahamic faiths of Judaism, Christianity and Islam, also have much to answer for in this.  In the story of Joseph we have a ray of hope for those who assert God’s just, equitable ways, but the struggle is real.

And from a very personal standpoint – particularly on this Sunday when we have lit the candle of JOY – I need to say one more thing.  A few weeks ago, I brought forward the words of Bishop T. Garrot Benjamin, Jr., who told us that in order to find God’s purpose for our lives, as individuals and as Churches, we need to identify our passion by “following the tracks of our tears”.  As our grandson, Jamie, has brought smiles and giggles into our lives, I am reminded that ever since I became a father some thirty-seven years ago, I have been moved to tears when I see dads and kids.  It warms my heart when I see dads carrying diaper bags and pushing strollers, dads encouraging and nurturing their children, dads playing with their kids on a playground, dads comforting their children at times of injury or distress.  I celebrate the dads and Granddads who coached baseball with me and the dads, stepdads, uncles and neighbours who helped me many years ago, when I was the Akela to a group of Cubs.  While I primarily think of Joseph as someone who graciously stepped back from making life unlivable for Mary, today I also want to imagine the joy he gained from his choice: he got to experience the joy of parenting the young child Jesus.  While it’s uncertain whether Jesus grew up to be a Tekton like Joseph, it’s not hard to picture Joseph showing his son the tools of the trade, much in the way that my father-in-law, Del, whose skills in stonemasonry, auto mechanics and all manner of tinkering got shared with his children, nephews and neighbour kids.  Thinking of the fresh joy that entered Joseph’s life at saying yes to God truly brings a smile to my face on this Sunday of Joy.

Whether the decision about what to do with Mary’s news was made by Joseph the childhood sweetheart, or Joseph the megaproject worker from out of town, or wise old established Joseph, I am glad he chose as he did. I celebrate the way that his choice enabled Mary not only to live, but to fulfill her calling as the one who would nurture the Christ Child, even as I reject the notion that that Mary’s future should ever have been solely in Joseph’s hands. I long for a world where Mary has complete self-determination, where the choices regarding her life, her future, her safety, are hers to make and hers alone, believing that in the Kin-dom of God power does not follow lines of gender.  And I offer my heartfelt prayer, for all men blessed with the opportunity to be an influence in a child’s life – as a father, stepfather, grandfather, uncle, coach, teacher or activity leader – that they may embrace that with vulnerability, kindness, respect and lots of joy.  May all this be so.  Amen.

References cited or consulted:

https://www.antislavery.org/slavery-today/modern-slavery/

Fleming, James W. – accessed at https://www.christianpost.com/news/jesus-carpenter-or-stonemason.html

Harmon, Chelsea. https://cepreaching.org/commentary/2022-12-12/matthew-118-25-3/

Merritt, Jonathan. https://www.jonathanmerritt.com/article/2020/7/19/how-the-hebrew-bible-dismantles-the-patriarchy

Souvay, Charles. https://www.newadvent.org/cathen/08504a.htm

Stroman, Jack. https://www.tallahassee.com/story/life/faith/2017/12/22/what-josephs-role-christmas-story/976519001/

“What about the children?” a 1998 VHS resource of Light of the World Christian Church, Indianapolis, Indiana.

© 2025 Rev Greg Wooley, Osoyoos-Oliver United Church Pastoral Charge.

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Matthew 1: 18-25 - Sunday, December 21, 2025 - Advent IV

  Pastor Chelsea Harmon, from the Reformed Church congregation in Langley, writes “In other years, [on the 4 th Sunday of Advent] we hear t...